The NFL season is finally upon us. It has been 213 long days since we watched the Seahawks face off against the Patriots in Superbowl LX, a matchup we will watch again tonight. And what better time than now to project the big winners (and losers) of the 2026 Chatham Moms Fantasy Football Season.
But first, let’s take a look at our latest Power Rankings brought to you by … you! Our intern, Pichael Pinzel, is currently on a leave of absence from MWF (he allegedly embezzled company funds; investigations are underway). So in his stead, I asked the league to rank all 10 teams however they saw fit. I then assigned each ranking a score and summed them to determine the league power rankings. ------------------------------------------------------------------- LEAGUE POWER RANKINGS (sponsored by duckfucks.com)
BiJettas (Furda) Threepeat (Viola) Magic in the Hampton (Varca) Immaculate Concepcion (Vintzel) Strib Club (West) Maltby’s Mans (Maltby) TiennAmon Square (Kudalkar) Sauce (Yeakel) Chathamite (Lapus) The Brumderdogs (Khan) -------------------------------------------------------------------
BiJettas was voted the clear favorite, and it was not particularly close. Pressure is on, Jettas.
For our main story today, I have decided to project every team’s regular season record, as well as who will make the playoffs, who will win the championship, and who will lose the toilet bowl. In order to do this, I examined every match up from every week, and picked the team I thought most likely to win that match.
Obviously many things can change during a fantasy season. I can’t predict player injuries or suspensions. I can’t predict who will make dumb trades or start/sit decisions. I can’t predict what players will randomly pop off this year. If I could do any of those things, I would probably make millions in gambling and wouldn’t be writing this article right now.
With that said, I have used all the information currently available to me to make my picks. Below you will see my projected regular season standings for each division. Below that, I have made my predictions for each round of the Toilet Bowl and the Playoffs. You might notice that some teams were tied in the regular season. In order to decide who earned a bye or made/missed the playoffs, I used my weekly projections to determine tiebreakers. Please don’t get mad at me if you don’t like my projections. I’m just a humble journalist, after all.
------------------------------------------------------------------- Projected Regular Season Standings:
CHAMOMS:
Magic in the Hampton (8-5)* BiJettas (8-5) Immaculate Concepcion (7-6) Strib Club (6-7) TiennAmon Square (4-9)
BBAFA: Threepeat (9-4)* Maltby’s Mans (7-6) The Brumderdogs (6-7) Sauce (6-7) Chathamite (4-9)
*Earned a bye in the first round of playoffs
------------------------------------------------------------------- Toilet Bowl Seeding:
7. Strib Club 8. Sauce 9. TiennAmon Square 10. Chathamite
Round 1:
Strib Club vs Chathamite Loser: Chathamite
Sauce vs TiennAmon Square Loser: Sauce
Toilet Bowl:
Sauce vs Chathamite Loser: Chathamite
Sorry, Chathamite. There may be penalty kicks in your future.
------------------------------------------------------------------- Playoff Seeding:
Threepeat Magic in the Hampton BiJettas Immaculate Concepcion Maltby’s Mans The Brumderdogs
Round 1:
BiJettas vs The Brumderdogs Winner: The Brumderdogs
Immaculate Concepcion vs Maltby’s Mans Winner: Immaculate Concepcion
Round 2:
Threepeat vs The Brumderdogs Winner: Threepeat
Magic in the Hampton vs Immaculate Concepcion Winner: Immaculate Concepcion
Championship:
Threepeat vs Immaculate Concepcion Winner: Threepeat
I guess his name choice was apt.